Hello. Actually I’m waiting for an abortion (Sat.) I’m 24 years old and I’ve been with my partner for two years. I really wanted to finish this relationship a long time ago but there was always something. He is a nice guy but I have just stopped feeling love towards him. It’s more likely just routine to me at this moment. He always stopped me, and now I find I’m around seven weeks pregnant. I really don’t know what to do. One day I’m sure I don’t want be with him and pregnant with him, but another day… I honestly have a problem with my decision. The worst thing was seeing the scan. OK, there was nothing special but there’s still something inside me…my heart is telling me different things than my head – help!

Editor’s note: Thanks for writing in…It sounds as if you quite like the idea of having a baby at one level, but you are having an abortion because you really don’t want to be tied to this man, aren’t you? That’s the real issue. Something deep down recognises that what’s inside you is of more value than you can understand but this is confused because you feel so negative about your relationship. The two things need to be separated out.

I strongly recommend that you ring the helpline before you go to the clinic/hospital so that you can talk through your ambivalent feelings about the abortion, your relationship and how you can get out of this trap that says you must choose between staying with the father and having the baby or doing neither. There are other creative solutions – you just need courage and support to consider them and then make the decision that you can live with. Ring the helpline today.